When I first moved to Lyon, I apologized so often that a baker once told me, with the gentlest eye-roll in France, “vous n’avez pas tué quelqu’un, hein” — you didn’t kill anyone, okay. Apparently, I was using pardon /paʁ.dɔ̃/ for everything, including apologizing for their mistake. If there’s one thing the French love (besides butter), it’s using the right kind of sorry in the right moment.
Let’s make sure you never over-, under-, or incorrectly apologize the way I did.
Quick Primer
French has several ways to say sorry, each with its own level of politeness and emotion. The three big families are:
- Light apology (oops, sorry)
- Real apology (I’m sorry, my bad)
- Deep apology (I truly apologize)
Some are for bumping someone in the metro, others are for forgetting your friend’s birthday. The trick is matching the right tone to the right situation.
The Everyday “Oops” Apologies
These are your safe, everyday “my bad, excuse me” phrases.
| French | IPA | English |
| pardon /paʁ.dɔ̃/ | /paʁ.dɔ̃/ | sorry, excuse me |
| excusez-moi /ɛk.sky.ze mwa/ | /ɛk.sky.ze mwa/ | excuse me (formal) |
| excuse-moi /ɛk.skyz mwa/ | /ɛk.skyz mwa/ | excuse me (informal) |
| désolé /de.zɔ.le/ | /de.zɔ.le/ | sorry (said by a man) |
| désolée /de.zɔ.le/ | /de.zɔ.le/ | sorry (said by a woman) |
Usage notes:
- Use pardon in crowded places.
- Use désolé(e) when you feel mildly bad.
- Use excusez-moi to get attention politely.
The Real “I’m Sorry” Apologies
When the situation needs more sincerity:
| French | IPA | English |
| je suis désolé(e) /ʒə sɥi de.zɔ.le/ | I’m sorry | |
| je suis vraiment désolé(e) /ʒə sɥi vʁɛ.mɑ̃ de.zɔ.le/ | I’m really sorry | |
| toutes mes excuses /tut me.z‿ɛk.skyz/ | all my apologies | |
| je te/vous demande pardon /ʒə tə/vu də.mɑ̃d paʁ.dɔ̃/ | I ask your forgiveness |
Usage notes:
- Add vraiment for stronger emotion.
- Use vous demande pardon in formal or serious contexts.
Deep, Serious Apologies
If you messed up badly, these help soften the blow:
| French | IPA | English |
| je suis navré(e) /ʒə sɥi na.vʁe/ | I’m deeply sorry | |
| je vous présente mes excuses /ʒə vu pʁe.zɑ̃t me.z‿ɛk.skyz/ | I offer my apologies | |
| je regrette sincèrement /ʒə ʁə.ɡʁɛt sɛ̃.sɛʁ.mɑ̃/ | I sincerely regret it |
These are emotional, very polite, and often used in professional or serious personal situations.
Saying Sorry For Being Late
I learned this one the hard way after showing up late to a dinner and earning the Classic French Disappointed Look.
| French | IPA | English |
| désolé(e) du retard /de.zɔ.le dy ʁə.taʁ/ | sorry for being late | |
| je suis en retard, pardon /ʒə sɥi ɑ̃ ʁə.taʁ paʁ.dɔ̃/ | I’m late, sorry | |
| excusez-moi du retard /ɛk.sky.ze mwa dy ʁə.taʁ/ | excuse me for being late |
Usage Notes & Common Mistakes
- Don’t overuse désolé. The French apologize less than English speakers.
- pardon is not emotional. It’s practical, polite, and used constantly in public.
- Never mix tu and vous in apologies.
- désolé vs désolée changes based on your gender, not theirs.
- je suis navré(e) sounds very polished—don’t use it with close friends unless you’re joking.
Mini Dialogues
Dialogue 1
pardon, je ne vous avais pas vu.
/paʁ.dɔ̃ ʒə nə vu za.vɛ pa vy/
Sorry, I didn’t see you.
pas de problème.
/pa də pʁɔ.blɛm/
No problem.
Dialogue 2
je suis désolé(e) pour hier.
/ʒə sɥi de.zɔ.le puʁ jɛʁ/
I’m sorry about yesterday.
ça arrive.
/sa a.ʁiv/
It happens.
Dialogue 3
excusez-moi du retard.
/ɛk.sky.ze mwa dy ʁə.taʁ/
Sorry for being late.
ne vous inquiétez pas.
/nə vu.z‿ɛ̃.kje.te pa/
Don’t worry.
Quick Reference
| French | IPA | English |
| pardon | /paʁ.dɔ̃/ | sorry |
| excusez-moi | /ɛk.sky.ze mwa/ | excuse me |
| excuse-moi | /ɛk.skyz mwa/ | excuse me (informal) |
| désolé(e) | /de.zɔ.le/ | sorry |
| je suis désolé(e) | /ʒə sɥi de.zɔ.le/ | I’m sorry |
| toutes mes excuses | /tut me.z‿ɛk.skyz/ | all my apologies |
| je vous demande pardon | /ʒə vu də.mɑ̃d paʁ.dɔ̃/ | I ask your forgiveness |
| je suis navré(e) | /ʒə sɥi na.vʁe/ | I’m deeply sorry |
| désolé(e) du retard | /de.zɔ.le dy ʁə.taʁ/ | sorry for being late |
| excusez-moi du retard | /ɛk.sky.ze mwa dy ʁə.taʁ/ | sorry for the delay |
Five-Minute Practice Plan
- Say pardon five times while imagining yourself on a packed Paris metro.
- Alternate between désolé(e) and je suis vraiment désolé(e).
- Create three quick apology sentences: one small, one medium, one serious.
- Read the IPA slowly—focus on the nasal vowels.
- Try one dramatic apology: je suis navré(e). You’ll feel instantly 10% more French.
Conclusion
Once you know which “sorry” belongs where, French stops feeling like emotional tightrope walking. You can bump someone, miss a text, or show up late without sounding either guilty or robotic. Master these, and you’ll glide through French life with fewer awkward moments—and far fewer disappointed baker stares.