In Mandarin, saying “sorry” is rarely a one-size-fits-all situation. The language offers a sophisticated spectrum of apologies, ranging from a grave expression of remorse for a serious mistake to a simple, weightless phrase used just to politely get someone’s attention. Choosing the wrong word defines the seriousness of your error: you don’t want to use a heavy, formal apology when you just meant “excuse me.”
Mastering this spectrum is crucial for navigating social and professional life in Taiwan. This guide breaks down the essential Chinese apology phrases by severity and context, ensuring you always hit the right linguistic note.
Level 1: The Formal Apology (True Regret and Remorse)
These phrases are reserved for actual mistakes, personal failures, or deep breaches of trust. They carry significant emotional weight and should not be used casually.
對不起 (Duìbùqǐ) – The Weighty Apology
對不起 (Duìbùqǐ) is the standard, most recognized term for “I’m sorry.” It is a strong admission of fault, meaning “I cannot face you” or “I have let you down.”
- When to Use It: When you have clearly hurt someone’s feelings, caused significant inconvenience, or made an undeniable error.
- Usage Template: 我對不起你，我不該… (Wǒ duìbùqǐ nǐ, wǒ bù gāi…) — I’m sorry to you; I shouldn’t have…
抱歉 (Bàoqiàn) – Formal Regret
抱歉 (Bàoqiàn) translates to “I regret” or “I feel apologetic.” It is slightly less intense than 對不起 but still formal. It is often used in writing, business, or official communications to express regret over a situation.
- When to Use It: In business emails, when an event is cancelled, or when expressing regret over an unavoidable situation.
- Usage Template: 很抱歉，我們的系統出問題了。 (Hěn bàoqiàn, wǒmen de xìtǒng chū wèntí le.) — We sincerely regret that our system had an issue.
Level 2: The Casual Excuse Me (Social Glue)
These are the indispensable phrases used constantly in daily life to smooth over minor social friction, interrupt, or express minor inconvenience.
不好意思 (Bù Hǎoyìsi) – The All-Purpose Social Softener
This is arguably the most essential phrase for daily life in Taiwan. 不好意思 (Bù hǎoyìsi) literally means “not good intention” or “I feel shy/embarrassed.” It is the versatile, low-stakes alternative to a formal apology.
- When to Use It:
- To get attention: Stopping a waiter/clerk (不好意思，請問…)
- For a minor bump: Brushing past someone in a market.
- To decline politely: Softening a refusal.
- Usage Template (Getting Attention): 不好意思，請問這個多少錢？ (Bù hǎoyìsi, qǐngwèn zhège duōshǎo qián?) — Excuse me, how much is this?
借過 (Jiè Guò) – Pardon Me / Let Me Pass
This phrase literally means “to borrow passage.” It is used when you need someone to move so you can get past them in a crowded area. It is a command delivered as a polite request.
- When to Use It: In the MRT, passing someone blocking an aisle, or navigating a busy night market.
- Usage: 借過，謝謝。 (Jiè guò, xièxie.) — Pardon me, thank you.
Level 3: Apologizing for Inconvenience (The Taiwanese Way)
Chinese culture places a high value on acknowledging the effort of others. These phrases apologize not for a moral wrong, but for the trouble you caused or the resources you used.
麻煩你了 (Máfan Nǐ Le) – Sorry to Trouble You
麻煩 (Máfan) means “trouble” or “bother.” This phrase acknowledges that your request has caused the other person work or inconvenience.
- When to Use It: After someone helps you carry bags, takes time out of their day for you, or completes a complicated favor. It is a polite way to close the transaction.
- Usage Template: 真的麻煩你了，非常感謝！ (Zhēn de máfan nǐ le, fēicháng gǎnxiè!) — I truly apologize for troubling you; thank you very much!
讓你久等了 (Ràng Nǐ Jiǔ Děng Le) – Sorry for Making You Wait
This is a required phrase if you are late or if you asked someone to wait for you, even for a few minutes. It immediately resets the social balance.
- Usage: 讓你久等了，路上塞車。 (Ràng nǐ jiǔ děng le, lùshàng sāichē.) — Sorry for making you wait; there was traffic on the road.
Level 4: Escalating the Apology (Deepest Remorse)
When a formal apology isn’t enough, you need to use specific verbs and phrases that convey humility and ask directly for forgiveness.
1. I Was Wrong: 我錯了 (Wǒ Cuò Le)
This is a full, non-defensive admission of guilt. It means “I was in error.” Often used between close friends, family, or when facing a superior.
2. Please Forgive Me: 請原諒我 (Qǐng Yuánliàng Wǒ)
原諒 (Yuánliàng) means “to forgive.” This is the highest level of apology, asking the other person to actively release you from your guilt.
- Usage Template: 我為我的錯誤感到抱歉，請原諒我。 (Wǒ wèi wǒ de cuòwù gǎndào bàoqiàn, qǐng yuánliàng wǒ.) — I feel regretful for my mistake; please forgive me.
Quick Reference Table: The Apology Spectrum
| Chinese Phrase | Pinyin | Literal Meaning | Severity / Context |
| 對不起 | Duìbùqǐ | I cannot face you | High: Serious mistake, deep regret. |
| 抱歉 | Bàoqiàn | I regret | Medium-High: Formal, business/writing. |
| 不好意思 | Bù hǎoyìsi | I feel shy/awkward | Low: Social friction, interrupting, minor errors. |
| 麻煩你了 | Máfan nǐ le | Sorry for the trouble | Low-Medium: Acknowledging inconvenience/favor. |
| 借過 | Jiè guò | Borrow passage | Low: Passing through a crowd. |
| 請原諒我 | Qǐng yuánliàng wǒ | Please forgive me | Highest: Asking for reconciliation. |
Yak’s Final Thought
The cardinal rule of apology in Chinese is to differentiate between 對不起 (duìbùqǐ) and 不好意思 (bù hǎoyìsi). When in doubt, always default to the low-stakes 不好意思; it is the lubricant of social interaction. Save the heavy artillery—對不起—for when you truly damage a relationship. Master the subtlety, and you’ll navigate Mandarin society with grace.